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Author:Tanya Stewart, Esq.

Fearless Focus Coaching / Articles posted by Tanya Stewart, Esq. (Page 16)

[Health] The Diet Tip You’ve Never Heard (that always works)

02

Jun

Health & Wellbeing, Motivation
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
0 Comments
2

The Diet Tip You’ve Never Heard (that always works)


Here’s What You Need To Know First –

 

There is no safe place outside of you,

IF there is no safe place inside of you.

 

 

You’ve heard me say it before- as within so without.

 

One cool thing to notice about truth is that it usually flows both ways.

 

So, when there is no safe place INSIDE of you-there can also never be a safe place OUTSIDE of you.

 

I always have my Alphas focused INSIDE for this reason.

 

 

How Most Alphas Mess Up Weight Loss


Yes, you can engineer, rig or force the external to “look right” for a little bit but it will always course correct to what you truly believe you deserve based upon the state of your inner being.

That is why I tell my Alphas, if you want to lose weight, you need to love yourself right now.

So if you’re fat, dumpy, frumpy, lumpy and grumpy-you are pretty much going to stay that way until you can muster up some appreciation for your form right NOW.

Hint: This is why 95% of diets fail. They are an external solution to an internal problem.

 

You don’t love yourself after you lose weight – you start loving yourself now and THEN you’ll start losing weight.

That’s the inside out approach.


Alphas who love themselves after they lose weight have given themselves conditional love, which everybody knows is kind of worthless.


When the only love you can get is kind of worthless, you keep believing that YOU are kind of worthless.


The thing all of the weight-loss gurus do not want you to know is that it mostly doesn’t matter which diet you pick, if you start it from the inside out.


Why do you think there’s a massive profusion of weight loss programs like weight watchers that now offer “group components”? They are trying to give you the love!


They call it support – but the reason that you need all this “extra support” to drink more water, eat less sugar and move a bit more is because you don’t like yourself enough to do it right now.


Pay close attention if you’re having to “bribe yourself” to take better care of your health. It’s kind of like having to sleep with a guy in order to get him to be nice to you. It pretty much means that you don’t like yourself enough to believe you are worth Quality treatment without payment.

The thing all of the weight-loss gurus do not want you to know is that it mostly doesn’t matter which diet you pick, if you start it from the inside out.

Why do you think there’s a massive profusion of weight loss programs like weight watchers that now offer “group components”? They are trying to give you the love!

They call it support – but the reason that you need all this “extra support” to drink more water, eat less sugar and move a bit more is because you don’t like yourself enough to do it right now.

Pay close attention if you’re having to “bribe yourself” to take better care of your health. It’s kind of like having to sleep with a guy in order to get him to be nice to you. It pretty much means that you don’t like yourself enough to believe you are worth Quality treatment without payment.

 


If you talk to people who are healthy and at a good weight for a long time – you’ll notice that they don’t use bribes.

 

They don’t have a “get into the swimsuit”, “get his love” or “get to cheat day” or any other external motive for their health.

 

They are, quite simply, good to their body because they love themselves and the body that they’re in.

 

 

 

It’s safe INSIDE them, so their body reflects that with a safer OUTSIDE.

Start from where you are while telling yourself the truth about your self-dislike and you’ll be able to change it. If you can’t change it, Dig Me Up, I can.

 

 

 

 

P.S. When I get too busy, I stop making as much time for myself, which isn’t self-loving. That translates into a messy kitchen -> less cooking -> eating junky food out. 

I’m now VERY mindful of this bad cycle.  If my kitchen looks unsafe (Outer), it’s reflecting dips in my self-love (Inner) which then show up on my body (Outer) and are fixed by better care of me (Inner). See it? 

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[Audio] Voicemail #10 Tanya Discusses the Origin of Your “Wins”

31

May

Audio, Life, Motivation
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
0 Comments
0

 

You’ve Got Voicemail…
 


Play Voicemail #10 (03:46)


Voicemail #10 Tanya Discusses The Origin Of Your “Wins”. When you look back, you’ll see some of the most amazing moments in your life were not orchestrated BY you…​​​​​​​

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P.S.  Hey, are you missing out on the weekly coaching videos? Stop it! 😉


Join/Follow here to see FB Live Broadcasts:

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P.P.S. Even my SONGBIRDS are Alphas!! I love hearing them in the background. Anyone else have chatty birds?

 

 

 

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[Family] The Parable of The Garden Hose

26

May

Uncategorized
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
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The Parable of The Garden Hose…

I know I’m loved because of a garden hose.

Oh? You need backstory? Coming right up!

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And recently he’s been doing well and I’m proud of him. He is not, nor has he ever been, demonstrative or affectionate. And like most Alphas, oh we want our Daddies to love us and tell us how proud they are.

We often learn love is “earned” by our father relationship. That’s a story for another day…

I love my Dad and I know he loves me though he says so very, very rarely. Our phone calls are about 2 mins and that’s okay…At least, they were 2 minutes until—–the weeds hit.

I started telling my dad I was struggling with the weeds in my yard. How fast they grow, how I have to mow more often. How I didn’t know which product to put out to help kill weeds while protecting grass.

Translation: His girl was in TROUBLE.

Do you see it Alphas? For the first time in, OVER 30 YEARS, I had a problem that I was sharing with my Dad that I hadn’t already ALPHA-ED! I still needed help.

My father, long retired, not able to walk long distances and no longer driving SPRANG into action.

He began calling me. Checking my weather. Checking my grass. Did I find a product yet? Once I did find one, he had advice on spreaders. I did hand spreading but….the weed killer needed to be watered in! I put it down expecting to use the next rain for that and POOF. No more rain for a week! (You can’t make this stuff up.)

We debated if it would still work. It should’ve been watered in right away but….I didn’t have a garden hose.

Why not? Not sure. I had a fancy one with a box and left it at my last home and just never got one. My dad went into action to get his baby girl a Garden Hose! He recruited my Stepmom for research. They finally decided it should be purchased in Texas from a store that has a location here to avoid shipping.

My dad called me to get my local store options and when I took longer than expected…he followed up! My Stepmom, Yvonne is an angel and another Mother to me.

She called WalMart’s customer service when their website wouldn’t work. Twice. In one day. (For those of you who don’t know, such a thing is nearly suicidal, as proven by her 14 minute hold time on just call #1). 

And you know what? We know this is love. Recognizing a need and filling it and doing what it takes and recruiting the help you need.  But letting someone know a need they can fill? THAT IS LOVE TOO.

Lesson for you: Don’t take as long as me to realize that you should be LOOKING for a problem that your parents can still solve for you. People NEED to be needed. To feel useful. To show love in return for all you do. Do not deprive them of a chance to HELP you Alpha.

Let your Help in, whether it’s your parents buying you a garden hose or a child holding the bowl while you stir…

 

 

 

 


P.S. I will not make this mistake again and am profoundly grateful to the weeds in my yard for bringing my Father into deeper connection with me.

He’s my hero again and it’s been WAY too long.

I’m ashamed to realize I missed this. (Shame is good, it motivates. Guilt? Bad. It paralyzes.) Free car washes here I come! Thank you Daddy!!! 

 

 

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[Focus Mag] Anatomy of an Alpha, Part 1 (Who ARE You?)

24

May

Uncategorized
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
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0

 
Our FOCUS: Alpha, Who ARE You?

My life caught fire when I figured out who I was and gave myself permission to be…THAT. Once I knew who I was, who I served was right there – clear, obvious and kinda easy.

Why easy? Hint: You tend to be born to serve…YOU!

Alphas are me. Different colors. Strengths and histories. At different spots on my timeline but…still me. It’s why its so easy to love you and how I understand you so quickly.

The more of you I meet, the more of you I KNOW, the more I see our similarities. We have common “orgin” stories. Patterns with men and money. Ginormous self-trust issues that show up as “other’s trust issues.” We are not wired to accept help. Etc…

I want you to know WHO you are. It is the truth and it will begin the process of setting you free.

I’ll do this in 3 Training Posts. In Part 1 today, we’ll look at what we are NOT and our high value skill sets. In Part 2, we’ll dive into Alpha Challenges and what we really want.  In Part 3, we’ll look back at our beginning to see how Alphas are forged and the specific Alpha Sabotages we ALL go through.

Somewhere in a coaching post, I’ll explain Alpha Fears (we’ve got a standard set, factory issue apparently! Although we often upgrade.)
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I’ve got you Alpha. Let’s do this…
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Chief Seattle, Native American Chief, City of Seattle, WA named for him
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“When you know who you are; when your mission is clear when you burn with the fire of unbreakable will; no cold can touch your heart; no deluge can dampen your purpose. You know you are alive.”

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Today’s TRAINING: Anatomy of an Alpha, Part 1


It is almost always easier to start with the negative, thanks to the evolution of brains that are wired to focus on that. 

See if you recognize any of these labels Alphas are given by others who do not understand us:

Too Smart – Too Loud – Too Pretty – Too Powerful – Too Bossy – Too Happy – Too Hyper – Too Spiritual – Too Aggressive – Too Opinionated – Too Controlling – Too Dominant – Too Anal – Too Logical – Too Cold – Too Judgmental – Too Confident – Too Arrogant – Too Sexy – Too Bitchy – Too Distant – Too Good for… – Too Know it All – Too Impatient – Too Selfish – Too Driven – Too Businesslike – Too Talkative – Too Intimidating – Too Pushy – Too Fast – Too Demanding – Too Greedy – Too Spoiled – Too Assertive – Too Emotional – Too Passionate – Too Protective – Too Fierce – Too Uptight – Too Serious – Too Different – Too Wild – Too Insatiable – Too Manly – Too Hard – Too Perfect – Too Picky – Too Irritating – Too Disruptive – Too Calculating – Too Analytical – Too Territorial – Too Sensitive – Too Focused – Too Unladylike – Too Friendly – Too Extroverted – Too Nosy – Too Crazy – Too Much…

Too DAMN ALPHA.

Okay. Writing that was interesting and therapeutic because I’ve gotten EVERY SINGLE ONE of those & bet I missed a few! Happily, since I’ve done the work I train Alphas to do, I DON’T GET THAT B.S. ANYMORE!

Now do a quick scan on most of the adjectives. Did you notice that when many of those descriptors are applied to a man, it’s a compliment?!

Yep, Alpha women are women who spend more of their time in their masculine energy and are good at that masculine energy. That’s not popular UNLESS folks needs to get shit done. THEN, they love us!

For my Soft Alphas, you had these traits too and you went into hiding. You compensate and try to appease folks more than an Alpha does so you WON’T get called these “names.”

I am here to tell you that if you drop the word “Too” most of these are not an issue. It is the amount and the timing that is getting you into trouble Alpha.
You’ve heard the old saying, when the only tool you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

The only tool most Alphas have before they begin with me, is the pushing, driving masculine energy.  It’s what we know. It’s what has always worked for us and even though we can see it costs us sometimes, we resign ourselves to just pay the cost.

What if you didn’t HAVE to struggle? What if success didn’t cost what you think it does?

You are not broken Alpha. You are lovely, powerful creation of the light. A lesser Goddess allowing in a bandwidth that exceeds what others commonly allow. You are meant for greatness and every moment you don’t go, you suffer. Every moment you play small, you feel it. You don’t even know what your Divine Mission is, but you know you’ve got one. (Hint: It’s big enough to scare you!)

If I were sitting with your right now at your kitchen table, I’d laugh and hug you and squeeze just a little too tightly, so you could feel one of your own tell you that come from Amazonian stock. Magnificent and you must be trained.

Merely being an Alpha isn’t enough, that is talent without training. You must be trained to know your skills, your weaknesses, your passion and purpose. To learn how to love YOU so you can attract those who can also love you, as-you-are.

Alpha High Value Skill Sets

We protect. We provide. We problem solve. We lead. We nurture. We see possibilities others don’t see. We want MORE. We risk. We course correct. We self-evaluate. We command intense focus in emergencies. We process very fast. We want the truth. We are ride or die. We are LOYAL. We are goal driven. We are either OFF or ON. We love deeply. We are creators. We think out of the box or even, screw the box. We are strong starters. We naturally take control. We are efficient. We are learners. We are warriors and will fight if necessary. We are advice givers. We are good lovers to the right partner. We are cheerleaders. We hold back the dark. We fix things (all things!), we are master fixers.

We are so useful that once folks see what we can do, they give us more and more and more. We are often given what is not “ours” to do because we will find a way to do it.  Thus, the ability to say NO is critical to an Alpha because there is little you CANNOT do. The test must not be your ability, the threshold must be limited to only your responsibility. 

***Learning to determine what you are and are NOT responsible for is essential to you having a life without struggle.

Your Question Alpha, is never “Can I?” but rather “Should I?”

Because we are fixers and can do about anything, ego has developed the perfect poison for this combo -> Rescuing. We rescue folks with our high value skill sets instead of using our gifts to further our own purposes and reduce our own struggle. Stop It.

Because of these skills sets, you often cannot find your way. You are TOO GOOD AT EVERYTHING to pick ONE THING. So you keep changing horses and never finish the race.

Our deep skill set is part of what makes Alphas strong starters and poor finishers. An uncoached Alpha does not yet have the building blocks of commitment in her life (self-trust, self-love and self-worth).  Without that commitment, things go sideways after you begin and you’ve learned to either bail or stay and suffer.

Alphas get what they ARE not what they want. That commitment issue you’ve got attracts people who bail on you, say they will and won’t and weak ass men (they have to be or you’d chew them up).  So you are pretty convinced that many folks can’t or won’t have your back.

The very skills that make us indispensable in business and formidable as opponents KILL us in relationships. That is because we use our high value skills to compensate for the inner, emotional heart work that we kinda don’t want to do.

You’ve tried. It just didn’t work out well, so you went with what you know, right?

You are an Alpha. You are extreme to most, frightening to many and beloved of me. I know you. I am you. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and I’m installing wiring to light the whole damn thing for us.

You are not too much. You are merely a warrior as yet untrained…
Alphas can have it all without struggle.

Tanya, Alpha & Leader of Alphas

See you in Part II

 


Tanya Recommends:


www.WordClouds.com
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This site will create a FREE word cloud image of whatever words you give it! Play with it. Start off my picking out your trait and putting those in a colorful word cloud that you keep on your phone, perhaps as your screen saver. Remind yourself that who you are RIGHT now is highly valuable 🙂

The cloud below is all of the “Too _____” adjectives from above!

 


Go through the list and pick out the 3 you’ve heard most often and write them down.


Now tell yourself  an example where each of these 3 “insults” is actually a strength when use in the right place and the right time.

A hammer is a wonderful tool, but not for breaking eggs or sewing.

We are all capable of knowing ourselves and when we do not, it is because we are afraid to look.

When you are afraid to look, it is because you have decided you will not like or accept what you see. How or why should anyone ELSE like, let alone love, what they see if you cannot bear to look?

Know yourself and own what you find, good or bad. From there, you can go anywhere.


Wow, Did You Hear?


76 yr Old Flying/Tap Dancing Alpha!

“I am really enjoying your posts, Tanya.  You’re right…..we don’t celebrate enough.  My tap dance group will be performing in 2 weeks.  I am already celebrating that I can remember all the steps and “perform” (big smiles, strong arms and hands flaring, stomps where called for, and oh yes….doing a fast time step). 

Also, another new thing in my life….flying.  My new boyfriend (age 81) is still a pilot and is teaching me how to fly his acrobatic plane.  I mean, what happens if he keels over in mid flight?  I have to learn how to bring it in, right?  Well, even taxiing is difficult in a tail-dragger type airplane….you have to have your feet on the rudder and brake and apply them with force if necessary.  Who knew? 

Looks really simple from the back seat, but when he puts me in the FRONT seat….EEEEK!  However, I am up to it (even at age 76).  When we flew in to the air show at Riverside, I’m sure we were the oldest couple landing…..let’s celebrate THAT!

Hugs and continued success to you!”
Jan F.

76. Tap dancing in a SHOW GIRL’S COSTUME with a NEW PILOT Boyfriend (81). Any other Alphas got some excuses for me??? Mic drop.  

— Tanya 🙂

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[Fun Friday] What Can You Celebrate?

19

May

Uncategorized
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
0 Comments
2

What Can You Celebrate?

I was doing a video for my Millionaire Mastermind on Celebrating. Our time together is ending and I want to know what they are doing to celebrate.

So many of my Alphas cannot SEE their own moments of genius and everyday wins.  You aren’t CELEBRATING enough!

 

Tanya Definition- Celebration: gratitude multiplied by joy.
 
When you are given good things, triumphs, progress, surprises and much needed help – your demonstration of gratitude determines whether you get MORE of them or LESS!
 
Example: My friend is having a dinner party. I lend her my serving dishes, hot food warmers AND wash them all after the party and pick them up. Me? Hero. She says…..casual “thank you”. Crickets in my heart. Do you volunteer to do this again next time? Hell NO.
 
Life is the same way. The big thank you, the ohmygoshIdidit and the high-fives celebrations are NOT OPTIONAL.
 
So…what can you celebrate tonight? Not next week. Not next quarter after the big sales push. Tonight.
 
Me? I’m going to see Daniel Escobar in concert. If you have been listening to The Voicemail, there is a haunting melody that pops on right after my audio ends. THAT’S Daniel Escobar.
 
He is the crazy, hyper talented violinist that reinterprets classical, pop and hip-hop on an electric violin. His music on SoundCloud Here. His Adele songs are luminous! Awaken & Freedom are my favorites.

 

 

Here’s how the Universe works.
 
I tell a guy about the violinist.
 
Guy sends me link of his recent talk show performance.
 
I think “hmmm, I should look to see when he’s in concert”.
 
Which, being human, I promptly forget to DO.
 
4 days later a girl in my Mastermind posts that she’s thinking about going to his Atlanta (my hometown) concert. Boom! I am provided for. We are going!
 
It’s even odder because I’m not really a concert person – I think I have been to a total of 4? concerts since I was 17, and one of those was a date.  Madonna, NIN, Duran Duran & can’t remember the date one. But this guy? It FELT like I should see him.
 
I am CELEBRATING the closing of my Mastermind with the concert.
 
You can celebrate without paying Ticketmaster a billion dollars. I celebrated Mother’s Day (even more cards have come in! High FIVES!) on my porch with a cup of Blueberry Merlot tea.
 
Celebrate a good day at work. Or the end of a bad day. Your children loving you. Your scale cooperating. Good hair. Return of the hummingbirds (I’ve got one so far). Telling yourself the truth. Not triggering and killing someone who clearly WANTS you to strangle them…
 
Celebrate. It’s why we all love that Kool & The Gang Song! (which has…ready? 87,437,551 views – rose 7K views while I typed)
 
Showing you are grateful for your good things
is asking for more good things.

 

P.S. I plan to have wine & chocolate (not Either Or – but Both AND) on my porch on Sunday and celebrate my new seedlings that have sprouted in defiance of my community of Alpha squirrels for whom “flower box” really means “squirrel assisted digging box.”​​​​​​​
 
P.P.S. I am betting we don’t do the “lighter” thing anymore! LOL!

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[Audio] Voicemail #9 Tanya on What You Are REALLY Asking For…

17

May

Uncategorized
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
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You’ve Got “The Voicemail”…

 

My Mother’s Day was AMAZING thanks to you! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. In today’s voicemail I use that story to show you what’s really important.​​​​​​​

 

Play Voicemail #9 (03:35)


Tanya discusses what you are REALLY asking for (a feeling) and why that distinction matters.  

 


P.S. I’m 6 for 6 on fantastic holidays, by practicing what I teach you. How have your holidays been going?
 
P.P.S. I just listened to my voicemail, my birds are so clear in the background! It’s beautiful 🙂

 

 

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[Audio] Voicemail #9 Tanya on What You Are REALLY Asking For… Facebook Twitter LinkedIn

[Focus] How Can Fasting Make You Money?

12

May

Uncategorized
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
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2

How Can Fasting Make You Money?

 

Not eating can increase your income.  Yep. And not just by saving on your grocery budget!

In this week’s training on Rejection, I taught you why the super successful people you want to emulate have less rejection – they manage their thoughts better than you.

Fasting is the choice to eat nothing, little or liquid during a time when you would normally eat and have food available.

Fasting is a CHOICE to not do what you could do.

 

 

Developing the focus to NOT do what you CAN do (restraint), simultaneously develops the confidence TO DO what it looks like you CANNOT.

Fasting exercises your control of your mind. We all perfectly aware that not eating for a day (or even 3) won’t kill us. In fact it can be biologically healthy and is more aligned with how humans were designed.

Back in the caves, food was not available at 8 am, noon, 6 pm and 9:30 for your snack.

So the TANTRUMS your mind is going to throw have nothing to do with your survival and everything to do with your COMFORT.

Newsflash: If you want something different in your life, you will need to become uncomfortable (i.e., change) to get it!

Fasting tests your ability to say No repeatedly to your temporary good and your ego’s demands, so you can achieve a greater, long term good.

Often fasting is associated with or motivated by a spiritual focus. That works. Then you are telling your spoiled, comfort seeking mind, “No, because I said so” and because are dedicating this effort to greater connection with Source.

Never done it? Try it (and no, I’m not your doctor & don’t know your medical history).

My most common fast is to fast all day, drinking lots of water and herbal tea, sometimes powdered greens (ask me who I use, they are pricey but delicious!) and then have steak and tomato for dinner.

That is the plan today. It’s BOOK DAY! I’m working on my new book, as yet untitled, The Guide for Alphas – ALL day with my best friend, while she works on her book 😉 I’ll break my fast with our favorite steak dinner!

 

Practice saying HELL NO to your mind. It is good for you & necessary for your dreams.

 

P.S. P.S. Practicing restraint builds self-confidence and your ability to tell your mind NO, we are going to do things MY way.

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[Focus Mag] Rejection – The Big Bad Wolf

10

May

Uncategorized
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
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magazine

 
 
 

Our FOCUS: Rejection

 

 

Why is it, that the people who have the lives you want, NEVER seem to get rejected?

 

That’s because they’ve taken back the power that rejection has over them by managing their thinking. Once you do that, rejection is marked “Passed” on your curriculum and you really do get less of it going forward!

 

You want less rejection and more acceptance in your life? Read on & do the work!

 
 
 

                     

Lecrae – American Christian Hip-Hop Artist, Songwriter, Producer

If you live for people’s acceptance, you will die from their rejection.

 

 

 

Today’s TRAINING:   Rejection – The Big Bad Wolf

 

 

 

Tanya’s Five Common Types of Rejection:

 

Wrongful Rejection – Someone blocks what you have earned.

Appropriate Rejection – You haven’t earned what you were seeking.

Divine Rejection – Redirection by the Universe when you are going the Wrong Way.

Expected Rejection – You decide (fear) you’ll get rejected, so you Self-Sabotage your attempt.

Self-Rejection – You don’t even don’t even try because you “know” you’ll be rejected.

 

 

 

Wrongful Rejection – Someone blocks what you have earned.

 

The first kind of rejection is the one that we focus on the most, wrongful rejection. Our focus on it is misplaced, as it is not nearly as common as your ego would have you think it is. Wrongful rejection is a lot like the way we think about violence against women.

 

The first thing that pops in our minds is a stranger attacking a woman in public. But most of the violence on women come from people they know, inside their own homes.

 

Wrongful rejection is terrible when it happens but it is not the most likely way you’ll tangle with rejection.

 

An example? Years ago I got on the wrong side of a very “aggressive” judge. This judge decided they did NOT like my client (I was his second attorney, long story) and wanted to punish him. The judge did something illegal and me? I objected and moved to block the order in writing.

 

THAT led to the Judge calling my office, getting my HOME telephone number and calling me out a shower to tell me that she was FINING ME (not her words) $1,500 that I was to pay to someone she liked or INSERT OMINOUS PA– USE threat to me.

 

The correct order that I submitted was of course REJECTED and the one she wanted, entered. And yes, I paid the money. Very. Very angrily.

 

(Happily, Universe keeps good books and I heard years after I’d left the practice this Judge was finally REMOVED from the bench!)

 

Wrongful rejections are rare.

 

 

 

Appropriate Rejection – You haven’t earned what you were seeking.

 

The second type of rejection is one we don’t want to talk about. This is rejection that is warranted.  You should’ve gotten rejected, because you were not qualified to receive what you were seeking to receive.

 

This is when your son goes out for the baseball team and hasn’t practiced all summer-so now he’s not as good as he was last year and doesn’t get the star spot.

 

Mostly, we are hurt by rejection when we don’t get what we want and very rarely do we stop to look to see if what we truly deserved what it was we wanted. Remember Alpha, you get what you are not what you want.

 

It seems to me from looking at the history of just my own country, the United States, that years ago we were more accepting of appropriate rejections. Now it appears, that the moment anyone is rejected, they instantly seek to make it a wrongful rejection without even considering whether it had merit.

 

I have actually had a man who didn’t believe in God, argue with me (a full time Spiritual Teacher) that I should date his atheist self because as a believer in God, I should be kinder and more open minded like my God commands and less biased against him because of his differing views! True story.

 

I’m fit and have had woefully unfit men argue their rejection.  Why You Should Be Ticking People Off…

 

Alphas. Want what you want and if it’s not what you already are, change.

 

 

 

Divine Rejection – Redirection by the Universe when you are going the Wrong Way.

 

Divine rejection has to be my favorite. It requires trust, which is why many of us struggle with this one. Divine rejection is when you’re going to wrong way and the Universe puts blocks in your path to turn you.

 

We are so programmed to believe that somebody is trying to take something from us that we should have that it doesn’t occur to us that we may be trying to get something that isn’t good for us or isn’t good enough for us.

 

Divine rejection is when God closes a door that leads to a burning building.

 

When your trust is solid, you can accept all rejection as redirection, even if the ‘delivery guy’ isn’t wearing angel’s wings!

 

 

 

Expected Rejection – You decide (fear) you’ll get rejected, so you Self-Sabotage your attempt.

 

Expected rejection is plain and simple your self-sabotage. This is when you expect people to reject you, so you subconsciously behave in ways that make it a lot more likely that you will be rejected.

 

This is the guy that’s convinced that the amazing girl couldn’t possibly be interested in him. So when he goes up to her, he has his defenses up and ends up acting like an ass.  Result? She’s not interested in him. And guess what? It’s just what he expected. That is the law. 

 

Expectation creates. All those stories in your head about the past where you screwed up? They help form your future expectations of failure and keep you screwing up. The rejection then becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

 

 

 

Self-Rejection – You don’t even don’t even TRY because you “know” you’ll be rejected.

 

Probably the most deadly of all the rejections and the least talked about is self-rejection – that’s where you don’t make any effort. It’s not easy to spot. You become so convinced that the world isn’t going to help you, that people ARE going to reject you, that you take NO chances.

 

You literally never asked the question, Will you? So you never get the know. Which means… It’s always a HELL NO!

 

 

If you are clever, and you are, you’ll notice that ALL of the rejections come from your thinking!

 

Expected & Self-Rejection, clearly come from your poor thinking. Appropriate rejection comes from your lack of merit, which starts with the thoughts and beliefs that prevented right actions to earn your way.

 

Wrongful Rejection? You just rendezvoused with a BIG JERK. What were you doing to ATTRACT this crazy person into your life? (Nope, I don’t remember what I did, but I know I did SOMETHING). So this is still you and the focus of your thinking.

 

4/5 you say. Nope. 5/5. Divine Rejection same deal. You have shut off your intuition, guidance, gut, small still voice – whatever you would like to name it. Your thoughts are blocking your right choices, which leads to this Divine Rejection Intervention.

 

All your stinking thinking leads to rejections. Now do you see why folks who have great success get rejected a lot less? They manage their minds better.

 

Control your thoughts, you control your words, your choices, your actions, your focus, your energy, your results and who you attract.

 

The rejections that you still get, won’t phase you because an Alpha in good control of her mind is self-confident, self-trusting, worthy and forgives people. She CAN be told no, but usually isn’t!

 

Tanya Recommends:

 

 

I told you that I love incense and I just discovered a new cool place to burn it, outside! I burn it on my front porch as I pace back and forth and work or relax!

 

I tend to have high end incense tastes but I wanted to share the most inexpensive incense I have found that I really like!

 

Gonesh #6 Perfumes of Ancient Times & Gonesh #14 Perfumes of a Mystic Forest

 

I have seen them at Walmart for $2.00 and just found them at a beauty supply store (I know, right?) for $1.49 a pack.

 

If you see the brand, give it a shot. Like anything, the more expensive the product, generally the safer it is and better the ingredients, but these are good for occasional burning.

 

tip

 

Assume for the next 30 days that every rejection you get is merely a Divine Redirection.

 

Notice how easily you recover, how there is no one to “forgive” and how whatever comes next is better, an upgrade.

 

Rejection gets it’s sting from the stories we tell ourselves about WHY we were rejected. No bad story? No bad sting.

 

 

 

 
 
 
 
 
 

spir

Rejection is all about trust that you are never kept away from that which you are ready for. When that is true, if you don’t have some good thing, it’s because you aren’t ready for it yet.

 

The way to get what you desire is improve, to change something about yourself.

 

If I asked Serena Williams onto the tennis court to play, I’d get rejected. If I want to play at that level, she doesn’t need to be kinder, I need to improve. Trust that you are always receiving your subconscious self-worth.

 

 

 

 

 

Wow Did You Hear?

 

 

 

Anna, Coaching Client Getting Results from My Affirmation

 

“These powerful words were given to me by my personal Business and Life Coach, Tanya Stewart.  <3  <3  <3

 

Whenever, I say them, my face begins to smile, because it creates in the pit of my stomach, a wide-eye feeling of excitement, wonder and anticipation. I feel like a child on Christmas morning wondering what’s there for me under the tree. The feeling is DELICIOUS!”

 

My Reply:

 

That is a LETTER perfect description of how an affirmation should make you feel JUST FROM SAYING IT!

 

If it makes you feel like that saying it, it WILL do its work. Too many say an affirmation that has no life or isn’t believable and look only for it’s result. Under those conditions, it’s not coming. We create and attract and manifest out of joy, expectation and faith  <3 I love you, Anna.

Talk to Tanya

 

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[Vulnerable] Sharing My Personal Dream For Mother’s Day…

05

May

Uncategorized
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
0 Comments
2

Sharing My Personal Dream For Mother’s Day…

 

I teach you to want what you want.  To ask. There is that famous line in an even more famous book that says “Ask and You SHALL Receive.” 

I would love to receive cards for Mother’s Day! I’ve always wanted to feel a part of Mother’s Day.

I don’t have biological children but I’m a MOM! 

What is a Mother?

 

I stand by you. I guide you. I pray for you. I feel so much pride when you do well. If a danger comes that is bigger than you are right now, I place myself between that danger and you. I accept no B.S. I cheer for you. The intensity of my belief in you and defense of you scares even me sometimes.  

I nod my head & listen to your history of wounding. I hold space for who you can choose to become. I give you my knowledge so your journey is easier than mine was. I release you and watch you stumble, even when it hurts me, because I know THAT is how you grow strong. Sometimes, I let you kick me or hate me. And your joy IS my joy….because I’m a Mom.

I would love to get a card from you this Mother’s day if I’ve been there for you somehow. 

An email, an e-card and even better (fingers crossed) physical cards can be mailed to:

Tanya Stewart, Esq.  – 3315 S. Cobb Dr. #813038 – Smyrna, GA 30080

If you are a mom like me, that doesn’t have biological “children” or yours aren’t supportive of you, I will send YOU a card if you ASK me!

Hit reply and say “ME TOO!” Those inside the U.S. who include their physical mailing address, will get an actual, personal card from me for Mother’s Day.

Outside the US? No worries, I subscribe to BlueMountain cards!

I’m so excited to ASK for what I want, now!

Maybe I’ll get one card or 40, either way I told the Universe what I wanted and told you, whom I love and who I serve. That is ALWAYS enough…

I don’t know what will happen next, but I BET it’s something good!

Thank you for loving me and thank you for LETTING me love you = receiving.

Receiving is hard for Alphas (you have to surrender control) and receiving truth is even harder (it’s UNCOMFORTABLE). An Alpha just texted me yesterday that “some of the things you say really turn me off.”

OF COURSE THEY DO! I’m more your “Mom” than your best friend!

I’ll tell you the truth that others won’t (that’s crucial) and usually it’s new & uncomfortable.

I told her I love her enough to tell her the truth, even if that means she won’t like me or hire me. Telling you the truth about who you are being can make some Soft Alphas run away from me (Goodbye C, I loved you honey) and that has to be okay too.

Being a Mom can be hard but you keep going, you keep loving and you keep expecting something good to happen next. I do 🙂

Love you,

“Mom”

 

P.S. If you really want to “feel” a certain way on Mother’s Day, what can you do to make that happen? Who can you ask to help you? Do that. Reach out for what you want. It’s not the flowers, it’s the FEELING. Tell someone you love how you want to FEEL on that day.

 

P.P.S. If you have a friend without children, send her a card this Mother’s Day. She may feel left out. It doesn’t need to be a Mother’s Day card like mine, but just REMEMBER her. Women without children feel very invisible and sometimes even broken on your “big” day. That was me.


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​​​​I Show Alpha Women Entrepreneurs How to Stop Struggling in Your Relationships, Own Your Potential, Build Your Business and BALANCE IT ALL.

 

 

 

[Vulnerable] Sharing My Personal Dream For Mother’s Day… Facebook Twitter LinkedIn

[Audio] Voicemail #8 Tanya Gives 2 Tips on Ending Procrastination

03

May

Uncategorized
Tanya Stewart, Esq.
0 Comments
0

You’ve Got Voicemail…

 

 

Play Voicemail #8 (03:22)

 

Two things you can do to help you finally do the things you are avoiding.

 

P.S. What would your life LOOK like if you just did 20% more of what you know you need to do? I bet it would start to get pretty good, pretty fast!

 

Make sure you aren’t caught in “Let’s Wait and See What Happens” Mode!

 

 

 

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​​​​​​​I Show Alpha Women Entrepreneurs How to Resurrect Relationships, Own Your Potential, Build Your Business and BALANCE It ALL. 

 

 

 

[Audio] Voicemail #8 Tanya Gives 2 Tips on Ending Procrastination Facebook Twitter LinkedIn