[Tools] The Whole Truth Series 3 of 4 – Telling The Truth
What would work better if we all told the truth?
What would break for us if we all told the truth?
We don’t tell the truth because truth carries consequences.
If you are not in a state of extremely high self love, you are not insulated enough from the consequences that flow from truth telling.
Roll up your virtual sleeves please!
Telling the Truth is Vulnerable
It is not enough to just SEE what is right and true.
It is not enough to be OK with HEARING others tell you the truth about you.
You must be able to TELL the truth to others.
That means ask yourself in any situation where you’re not telling the truth -what is it that I am afraid of losing here?
Truth telling is always about security. The greater your security, the less you fear the loss of approval of others and the pressure they’ll exert to notbe made “wrong”.
The energy of truth and love and prosperity are all the same. When you make a habit of telling the truth, you may not have as many friends but the ones you have will be true to you. Love will stay with you and money is invited in. (We’ll spend ALL next month on attracting money!)
I’ll repeat the obvious – you cannot ask the Universe to give to you what you are not already doing.
You do first, world does second.
If you have issues with people telling the truth (offshoots include loyalty, infidelity, commitment issues and insecurity) then YOU need to ramp up your own truth telling.
Practice Makes Perfect (or at Least Easier)
Start your practice by telling truth to yourself, then strangers – loved ones require the most practice and are therefore last up.
Before you tell anyone the truths you see, you’ll need to know how SAFE you feel about telling it. The safety consideration shouldn’t be part of it, but it is.
Look at our political and government systems today. No one feels safe enough to tell the truth. When people tell the truth they are punished, ostracized , judged, doubted and sometimes even jailed, fired or beaten.
It would be nice if we just admitted that we want OTHERS to always tell the truth and for US to have the option!
Stop expecting your kids, boss, coworker, mate and clients to do consistently what you’re not doing consistently.
And remember, awareness (truth) proceeds change.
Mostly no one wants to hear what you’ll say, because the solution may be scary (i.e., involve uncomfortable change or responsibility taking).
Knowing all of that, begin practicing telling uncomfortable truths anyway.
I ran my own high conflict divorce law firm and practiced crazy family law for over 15 years.
I told my clients that the advice they most needed to listen to, was whatever advice that they LEAST wanted to hear. They were literally paying me for the handful of times I would tell them the truth they didn’t want to hear. (Same thing as a coach!)
Over my years of practice, I got better and better at learning how to tell uncomfortable truths -and yes it’s a skill set. Ask me for help if you need it.
Here is the most important thing I’ve learned about speaking truth – the MOTIVATION for telling it, determines HOW it’s received.
If you are motivated to tell the truth out of love and compassion, with a sincere desire to help or bring about change, it will be received differently.
I tell people blunt truth all the time – like seriously terrible stuff they do not want to hear – and yet they still feel loved and seen by me and don’t feel attacked.
You CAN tell a difficult truth without attacking someone. And our world needs more of this and I vote it starts with you. Hop on it with me now.
P.S The sign of a very healthy relationship is how easily both partners can share unwelcome truths with each other.
When a relationship (romantic, business or family) can share what hurts it, it can heal. When it can’t, it is slowly poisoned.
Tanya Stewart is “The Alpha Woman Coach” and began coaching strong women as a Divorce lawyer in her own high conflict law firm 20 years ago. She understands how Alpha women are wired and using her Master’s level Metaphysics background and Advanced Clinical Certification in Hypnotherapy, she brings rapid change to people she works with.
She is a speaker, published author and Mensa member whose coaching is recommended by the World-Famous Motivator, Les Brown, Best-Selling Love Coach Greg Baer and International Change Expert, Dr. Eldon Taylor. She can teach you to separate struggle from success.
ALL My videos are always on my Vimeo channel HERE
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